S&M

As the summer slowly creeps in, I notice: some people are settling down, some people are just settling and some people, like myself, simply refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.

...and so, I wonder...

what's with all the settling? would you settle for half an empty carton of french fries when you clearly ordered a super-size? Would you settle for a B, when you KNOW you deserve an A? If you answered "no," then why plea bargain your heart? Or, in the alternative, for those who do wait for those butterflies, what happens when nothing comes of it? Then you, too become a victim of settling-settling for the hurt that ensues unrequitted butterflies. No? Perhaps.

Just wondering why are we innately masochistic? Or is it that I'm just a masochist? I always looked at people who believed in S&M in a different light. Neither praising nor judging the behavior- I just looked at them ...differently. Oddly. Until recently, I developed a S&M relationship of my very own. Except this one had not whips, and chains no spanking. It wasnt a S&M in a sexual way. It was an emotional S&M--S&M, sadism and masochism, is comprised of one who inflicts pain and one who takes the pain--and thats exactly what it was. He would hurt me, and I would come back. smh. I didnt know where i went wrong? I didnt settle. I waited for my butterflies-and got someone who made me feel as if he ripped off their wings. So is it come to pass that pain really is pleasure? Le Doleur Exquisite, perhaps?

:sigh:

:shruggs:

TBC

Jay